WHY ARE YOU LOOKING FOR EXTERNAL APPROVAL???
A motivationMY friend is going through the fact that this person is feeling "left out". My question would be, why? Why are you feeling "left out"? Is there something wrong with you? NO! Nothing is EVER wrong with you. So why do you still feel "left out"?
Have you ever considered the circumstances?
It takes a LOT to feel left out. Wanna know why? I consciously chose to not have "friends" when I was in high school. I never liked anyone, I loved being alone, but I still had friends from church. Circumstances led me to being "alone". I couldn't speak any other language but English while my other friends spoke in Chinese or Malay. I would always go to school alone, in fact I used to sit alone in class, and then eat alone, then go home alone. I was used to being alone. But surprisingly, I didn't feel left out. Why? Of course now I realized why. It was because I didn't really care for the people around me then, nor did I want to know about their lives.
You feeling left out, isn't really the problem. It's the problem of the friendship. The relationship. That is bigger that what YOU're feeling. If you are reading this, please ask yourself. If the people who are making you feel "left out" care for you, you wouldn't be feeling like this anyway!
COMMUNICATE!
Communicate how you feel to the people whom are making you feel this way. Chances are, it would be a 50-50 shot. There could be 2 outcomes:
1. You were wrong. You were being overly sensitive and misreading the situation. This is the best case scenario. Your friendship would be back to normal, and every one would be all happy and dandy.
The second outcome, however, isn't such a lovely one.
2. They aren't really interested in you anymore. They don't really wanna be your "friend" anymore.
But here's the thing. Are you a 5 year old child? That you need friends like that? Get the heck away from people like them! They don't need you and you don't need them. I always believe in this statement:
"Surrounding yourself with the right people
can turn your day around"
As much as you don't deserve to be treated that way, they don't deserve to have a friend like you. While you may have lost the friendship, but you gain strength. The strength to not be overly dependent and bonded to others. The strength to say "NO" when you need to. The strength to go out there and smile to the other friends around you, who treat you well and make you feel "in".
When you feel left out, think of whether the friendship is worth salvaging or not. If yes, then communicate. If not, turn around, and just smile. Because your smile could turn someone's day around.
Remember, there's nothing worth feeling bad about. These days, lifestyles are just so quick, that you don't really have the time to meetup, sit and chat over coffee. But that's what phones, social media and technology are for! Put them to good use! Don't make yourself feel "left out".
Last but not least, TURN THAT FROWN UPSIDE DOWN AND SMILE... :)
Love always,
DancerGal Sheryl <3
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